We’ve Removed the Traffic Lights

Imagine explaining to your grandparents that we have removed every traffic light, stop sign, speed limit, and rule about who has the right of way. (Listen to https://youtu.be/iL0yYGhN2B4?is=LZvvQmaTRY84K5RXEpisode 7 of my Podcast).

People can still drive. Most will even get where they are going. But every junction asks them to negotiate with everyone else, in real time. There will be more near misses, more collisions, and a lot more effort spent on a task that used to have a rhythm.

Now imagine a generation growing up that way. If you suggested bringing the signals back, they might say: “But I like driving whenever and however I want. Why make it so boring?”

We removed the traffic lights from eating, too.

When did eating lose its edges?

For many of us, eating no longer has a clear beginning and ending. We have a few bites while cooking, something with our coffee, a snack at our desk, a taste as we pass through the kitchen, and a little more at night. Things sold as food are available everywhere, all day.

I am not saying that eating is a problem. I am asking whether this constant access is working for you. If you feel pulled toward the next bite even when you were not planning to eat, it can be hard to hear your own hunger and fullness signals through all the noise.

“But I enjoy it.”

Of course you do. Highly rewarding things are designed to be enjoyable. When I talk about changing how, when, and what we eat, some people hear “less pleasure” or “a life with rules.” I understand why. If you are used to reaching for something delicious whenever you want a lift, a pause can feel boring at first.

But a traffic light does not take the joy out of a journey. It makes room for the journey to happen with less chaos. Eating can still be pleasurable when it has a beginning, an ending, and some space in between. You might even enjoy a meal more when you sit down and give it your attention.

Bring back a little structure

This is why I teach Meal. Gap. Meal. Make a meal an actual event: Sit. Pause. Eat. End. Then let there be a gap before the next meal. The meals, the timing, and the length of that gap should fit your body and circumstances. This is a rhythm to explore, not a test of how long you can go without eating.

You do not have to redesign your whole life today. Start with one meal. Notice when it begins. Sit down for it. Notice when it ends. Then pay attention to what happens before you eat again: hunger, habit, pleasure, stress, or simply the fact that something is within reach.

The point is not to make eating joyless. It is to give eating enough structure that you can choose how you want to participate in it.

We removed the traffic lights. But we can decide to put some back.